Bill Brady Diversity Extends To Whites AND Christians In Illinois Governor’s Race


Brady seen here smiling at people who are like him

Vowing to ensure that the homogenous perceived majority is represented in Illinois, Republican Gubernatorial Candidate Bill Brady is now extending an olive branch to groups the GOP had previously ignored.  Brady proudly seemed to say, “It is my responsibility to ensure that ALL of Illinois is represented when I am elected.  Whether you are white and Christian, or Christian and white, there is room for you here in this tent.  Oh, there are economic standards on that as well, oh, and lifestyle choices too.  Don’t want gays in the tent.”

Brady quickly pulled himself back on topic and despite voting against equal pay for women and women’s rights as if to say.  “As long as they don’t want abortions, aren’t gay, don’t want to be paid the same amount of money as their gender superiors…where was I?  Oh…yeah, it will be fine.  I’m like that Don Draper guy, but modern.”

When asked how this differentiates him from previous Republican candidates Brady admitted, “I’m totally progressive…now.  As long as we aren’t talking about abortions or gays or other icky things they didn’t have back when my hairstyle was first developed.”

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2 Comments

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2 responses to “Bill Brady Diversity Extends To Whites AND Christians In Illinois Governor’s Race

  1. Ebay has a sale on a Flea Circus Big Top Tent that sounds just about right.

  2. SlowhandKev

    He ended his remarks with a rhetorical “Is you is, or is you ain’t, my constituency?”…

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